Years ago, I lived with a bunch of roommates in order to save money. It hurt my dating life, but they were a good bunch of guys. Over the course of the five years I lived with them, I had a number of epiphanies, and I would like to share two of them; both concerned dishes.

We moved out of a dilapidated cabin of a house (in which I lived in the partially finished basement) into a much nicer place we named the “Bagley Estate,” in honor of it being on Bagley street. Amusingly, I also worked in Bagley Hall at the U. of Washington. It was like I could never quite escape his legacy, this “Bagley” person. In any case, whenever roommates are involved, dirty dishes (almost) inevitably pile up due to the lack of accountability that comes with anonymity. This is related to a general school of thought about what happens without accountability (NSFW).

I hated the dish situation at the old place, and so I “invented” a “novel” solution. I gave away every piece of flatware and silverware that didn’t fit in a single load of the dishwasher. If the dishwasher was full there were no more dishes. As a consequence, there were very few dishes abandoned in the sink.

It got me to thinking, however, about the possibilities of a dishwasher designed for bachelors. It would have two halves. As dishes were used, they would be transfered from the clean compartment to the dirty compartment. Then, when the dirty compartment was full and the clean empty only one compartment need be run. Once it was clean there would be no need to unload it! Just start the process of transferring the dishes into the now empty compartment. I drew a crude schematic of the device. I considered applying for a patent.

Like most ideas, it had already been both invented and perfected. It is called a Double Dishwasher and there’s a stealth model that looks like two drawers.

If you don’t have $1000, or you don’t own your home, I have another idea. It’s a magnet that attaches to the front of your existing dishwasher. You only use half of the dishwasher and transfer dishes from the clean side to the dirty side (rinse them, of course). Since it will never have a full load, only use the “light wash” feature so you won’t feel guilty about wasting water. Pick one up for just 5.99!

-Peter